Hard To Get

I just realized I had a Rich Mullins CD in my car instead of in the cabinet that burned–happy discovery!  It reminds me how glad I am that Rich is with Jesus and how much I miss him making music here. Just before he died in a car crash, he recorded some demos of the album he was working on.  The first was a song about sorrow and confusion and faith. I’ve always loved the way it captures the way that faith is something worked out and worked through.  That it isn’t an easy way out of all the hard parts of life.

It is a song that is really a prayer and it is meeting me right where I am right now.  I hope it encourages you, too:

You who live in heaven
Hear the prayers of those of us who live on earth
Who are afraid of being left by those we love
And who get hardened by the hurt

Do you remember when You lived down here where we all scrape
To find the faith to ask for daily bread
Did You forget about us after You had flown away
Well I memorized every word You said

Still I’m so scared, I’m holding my breath
While You’re up there just playing hard to get

You who live in radiance
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in skin
We have a love that’s not as patient as Yours was
Still we do love now and then

Did You ever know loneliness
Did You ever know need
Do You remember just how long a night can get?
When You were barely holding on
And Your friends fall asleep
And don’t see the blood that’s running in Your sweat

Will those who mourn be left uncomforted
While You’re up there just playing hard to get?

And I know you bore our sorrows
And I know you feel our pain
And I know it would not hurt any less
Even if it could be explained

And I know that I am only lashing out
At the One who loves me most
And after I figured this, somehow
All I really need to know

Is if You who live in eternity
Hear the prayers of those of us who live in time
We can’t see what’s ahead
And we can not get free of what we’ve left behind
I’m reeling from these voices that keep screaming in my ears
All the words of shame and doubt, blame and regret

I can’t see how You’re leading me unless You’ve led me here
Where I’m lost enough to let myself be led
And so You’ve been here all along I guess
It’s just Your ways and You are just plain hard to get

“Hard To Get” from The Jesus Record by Rich Mullins & a ragamuffin band

“Surely our griefs He Himself bore, and our sorrows He carried; yet we ourselves esteemed Him stricken, smitten of God, and afflicted.” Isaiah 53:4

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One thought on “Hard To Get

  1. I love that song so much. Man… top 3 Rich Mullins for me. I want “If I Stand” played at my funeral though. Great to hear it is well loved by another as well.

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